Ever since Gretchen and Jon Cleveland expanded their family to five this past fall, their lives have gotten fuller. But the change has also prompted the Middleton couple to become extra attuned to the simple pleasures of everyday life.
Gretchen, a lawyer at a health sciences company, and Jon, who works for a career development program at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, are parents to five-year-old Yale, three-year-old Neve and six-month-old Elisabeth, whom they call Birdie.
“We knew going into it this was our last baby,” Gretchen says. “I am just completely loving it. With the other two, I was so excited for what comes next and anticipating those milestones. With her, I am much more appreciative of the baby stage.”
While she and Jon have more experience this third time around, it doesn’t mean life is a breeze. “It is so chaotic right now,” Gretchen says with a laugh.
A key for the couple is identifying where each excels at parenting, and the activities each is drawn to. Jon is great at “all the fun, silly stuff,” like playing with Legos and goofing around at the playground, while Gretchen loves to be creative with the kids, happily digging into paints, Play-Doh, kinetic sand and other messy pursuits.
It’s important to Gretchen and Jon that they model such authenticity and thoughtfulness, as they want their kids to grow up confident in embracing what excites them and with a freedom to be themselves.
“I want them to be comfortable in who they are,” she says. “I really focus on trying to be proud of who they are.”
It’s similar to the approach Gretchen brings to her blog, The Act of Converging, which explores how to combine the seemingly disparate facets of oneself — parent, spouse, employee, friend and all the other roles one encompasses — into a life that strives not for balance but rather fulfillment.
That important shift of intention plays out home, where simple pleasures like a big pancake breakfast are celebrations of daily life. And weekends are time for reading books, making “bunny houses” out of couch cushions and coming up with impromptu fun, like using painter’s tape to make obstacle courses. “It’s awesome when it’s cold and they need to get the wiggles out,” Gretchen says.
The Clevelands also have beloved routines, such as taking family drives in which the parents sip coffee and the kids chat and nap, and going out for Mexican food on Sunday evenings. But nothing beats the nightly bedtime slothing competition, in which the two big kids grab onto their dad’s raised leg and hang like sloths, earning points for creative stunts and dismounts.
It’s moments like these that make a family, and Gretchen doesn’t let them pass by without notice. “I’m really trying to savor everything,” she says.
– Photos by Jen Lucas.